For Kenton - A Moment

I have never known so many generous, kind, sensitive and loving men at one time, as I have since I started tango.

One tanguero in particular, one of the first gentlemen to dance with me, always greeted me so warmly at every milonga that I thought we must have known each other in a past life. As I watched him make his way around the room, with his deep voice and bear hugs, bringing a smile to every person he came into contact with. I never saw his kindness, gentleness or patience waver. Not in the three years since I started tango. He didn't need acquaintance in a past life to make someone feel like family, it was just his nature to treat people that way.

The last time I saw him, he was relaxing in the deep, comfy black couch (that once seated in - is remarkably difficult to get out of) at Esquina Tango watching the milonga swirl chaotically in front of him. His eyes focused past the dancers, to everywhere and nowhere in particular. He smiled a soft, somewhat tired smile, patted me on the hand and asked how I was. We chatted for a few moments, about everything and nothing in particular, and then a cabeceo brought me out to the floor. I could still hear his deep, booming voice checking in with everyone who passed by.

Within days of finding out that he was sick - before I could see him again and check in - he was gone. We all thought we had more time.

His deep, laughing voice is still in my ears, but he is now too far away to hold.

“So I learned two things that night, and the next day, from him: the perfection of a moment, and the fleeting nature of it.” ― Margaret George, The Memoirs Of Cleopatra

Comments

Tim Ferriss and the Myth of Tango Mastery

Dear tanguero, I feel I should explain my reaction to your comments about Tim Ferriss. It touched a nerve and I didn't really explain my apparent hostility. It was certainly not meant for you. Several people have brought Tim Ferriss to my attention over this past year. I can usually make it a month before his name pops up again. For readers who are unfamiliar with him, he's the author of "The 4 Hour Work Week". He set a Guinness record for the most consecutive tango turns and has competed with his partner, Alicia Monti, at the Tango World Championship . As a social dancer the idea of a tango competition seems absurd. I don't think I will ever understand how something like tango could be judged - or why anyone would want it to be. But I digress. I think the most crucial detail of Ferriss's history, as I relate it to tango, is his winning Wired magazine's "Greatest Self-Promoter of All Time" . If there is any concept more out of synch with social ...

"Proper" Tango Shoes

Periodically someone, usually a man, will be bring up the topic of "proper tango shoes." If he's referring to the problem (and dangers) of trying to dance in flip-flops, or mules, or platform shoes etc., those are definitely valid, and very helpful points to be made. The likelihood of damaging your feet is very high without the proper support of high quality shoes. My problem comes with the idea that the *only* proper tango shoes have 4" stiletto heels on them and fetish-worthy embellishments. (Okay, I'm pretty keen on the embellishments myself.) "goofy ballroomy shoes are a turnoff... get rid of them..." - Alex Tango Fuego (granted this is from 2007), http://alextangofuego.blogspot.com/2007/10/to-dance-or-not-to-dancebrutally.html And, in the comments on a blog post, Anonymous said... " This is a controversial one. If a follower isn't wearing tango shoes then it's usually a good sign she's not particularly good." From Ms. Hedgeh...

Tango solidarity when it counts . . .

Some fellow tanguera-bloggers and I have been having a wonderful online "conversation" via blogs, Twitter, Facebook and email - about the importance of sisterhood and solidarity. You can find Stephanie's post, here and her follow up here , and then Tangocorazon's here . I was so bouyed by the idea of women bonding, helping and supporting each other that I took some things for granted. I took for granted that it would always be easy, enlightened as I am /*cough*/ to be the sort of consistently nurturing and helpful tanguera that I am (in my head) . The truth? Where the rubber met the road (or rather when the discomfort hit the milonga), I wasn't. Here's a little background that gave me a better perspective on the events at the New Year's Eve milonga. These guidelines appear under the heading " Behavior at the Milonga " on Vancouver Island Tango: " . . . The smaller the tango population, the more 'effort' required from each one of th...

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